My Reindeer Selections

As I ride two hours with Kelsey and her mom to go pick up Kelsey's grandmother in the middle of Iowa, I wisely brought my computer and decided to throw up a holiday post.

As most everyone knows, Santa had nine reindeer.  I believe their names were Dancer, Dasher, Prancer, Vixon, Comit, Cupid, Donner, Blitzen, and one really popular one named Rudolph the Red Nose Reinstick.  I did that off memory without having to look it up, so please keep your applause to a minimum. 

Anyway, as I continue to gain weight thanks to my carb and wine only diet, I was thinking that I'm not too far off from interviewing for a Santa job in the future.  I love cookies, I like presents, and I'm really, really good at wrapping.  Because I love drafting and picking teams, I thought it would be perfect to identify the guys in PCTI that need to physically prepare in 2013 by improving their abilities to drag a sleigh.  Below in order is who I would select to replace the current set of reindeer, and why:

1-Dasher; Smo:

A good communicator with a proven record in logistics, having Smo in the front would guarantee the team would be able cover every house in the world over the course of the 4 hour allotment of delivering gifts.  His height and length will make it easy for the reindeer towards the back to understand any changes in routing and ensuring the quickest and most fluid route possible.  Seeing as how I don't know how to get anywhere, a master of logistics is necessary.  Maybe the most important part of his skills is Smo's unbelievable stamina, which will be a huge perk on such a high octane night.

2-Dancer; Michael Beasley:

Known for his dancing, fluid hips, and good base, Dancer's name matches up perfectly with Beas's skill set.  Since the power guys are needed in the back of the sleigh, getting the speed guys is necessary for success.  A guy with a well regarded history as a boat captain, the transition from boat to sleigh should be seamless.  His experience dealing with snow will be intrical on a team of deadbeats that would shut down at the sign of a flurry, so his snow leadership will be able to keep this group together when the going gets tough.

3-Prancer; Joe Thompson:

Both prima donna's, the transition from Prancer prancing around to The Actor being scared of messing up his pretty white grill, both have their fair share of negatives.  A high risk pick, the team of reindeer must hope Actor will be motivated and ready to perform in his role of "Cultured" deer.  His knowledge of the best coast, along with Europe will offer some help, and his fantastic natural conditioning will be a great fit for the team during a long night.  If he can keep his attitude in check and doesn't get disgruntled at any point, it could be a steal for Santa.

4-Vixon; Bryan McKinney:

Many people would probably think McKinney is on this list because he is a smart guy that would add a lot of savvy with his ability to pack a ton into a small bag, but that's the furthest reason as to why this selection. I believe McKinney is the dumbest smart person I know.  Actually, no convincing needed.  He convinced me of this 10 years ago.  The good news is that beyond his role as designated sleigh packer, his outrageous conditioning, can do attitude and friendship with the Actor will go a long way in keeping the Actor happy, and with his legs churning non stop, keeping the sleigh going all night long.

5-Comet; Josh Stephen:

Now we start to bring in the brute strength group to give the sleigh the necessary push it needs.  A high motor idea guy, Abe will bring effort, strength, and a plethora of random thoughts that could really go a long way in improving Christmas for everyone involved.  Maybe we are stumped on what to get someone, Abe will give us the idea.  Every team needs a creator/creative guy.  That's his role, and after the chef thought, no one will debate what he brings to the tabstick.

6-Cupid; Brian Eskildsen:

At this point I don't think anyone would debate that Cupid just makes sense for PCTI's newest "Big Pun."  No one drops his success with women as subtly as Skillz, so inserting him into this role is the easiest choice of all.  Bringing his skillset of discipline, strategy, and conditioning, he will make sure to keep the team focused on the task at hand, and doing whatever needs to be done to accomplish what we set out to do... And look good doing it.

7-Donner; Scott Donley:

Keeping the trend towards the back of the sleigh brute strength, conditioning, good looks, and snow experience.. Donley is the only experienced snow blower/shoveler on the team (He is no South Bend Shovel Slam though), helping him carve out a significant niche as a role player, a lot like he does on the basketball court.  Also, him taking this role would finally give his wife a legitimate reason to be proud of him, rather than just his Hast like abs. 

8-Blitzen; Bruiser Van Gay:

Who else better to push the pile than the power squatting, dead lifting, power cleaning, Cruisemoneystick.  This is a high risk, high reward pick as Stickman is currently suffering from a knee injury suffered from a kickball game (#priorities), so whether he can provide that stout backbone on this important team remains to be seen.  One trait that is non-existant on the rest of the squad is his off the charts talent that he has with kids.  His dimples and smile make him a jolly old man, so expect him to be a potential MVP candidate if he can get through his kickball injury.

9-Rudolph; Ben Wilson:

Sticks out like a sore thumb with no discernable skills/traits/etc.  Good for a wisecrack or two, but nothing else.  Fits the mold but will destruct the team, and thus Christmas altogether.

 Happy holidays.  Remember, they are holiday trees, not Christmas trees.

Congrats, you guys. We made it.

PCTI IV is no longer in Jeopardy (!) .  Happy Holidays you maroons.

#freejavale

This is how you shoot a FT

Dan The Boy, FreshPoint Dallas Agree to Terms

In a sudden twist of events, Dan The Boy has been traded to FreshPoint Dallas after a brief and unheralded stint playing for the Northern California squad.  The move is part of FP Dallas's attempt to start a youth movement, after being a family run business for the last 100 years.

This transaction now puts PCTI Texas up to three members, one away from the original four that helped formulate PCTI in it's rookie year.  The ball is now in the court of Dallas natives Joe Thompson and Antione Hopkins to bring that deficit back to even.

The Boy will be reunited with Jeff Sabin, guaranteeing the two to be locking horns twice a week in an effort to prepare for PCTI4.

The Boy's growth from a chemistry perspective with teammates Skillz and Pitto will be stunted, but hopes of Skillz moving into a role with the SMU Lady Mustangs is always a possibility.

Anyone else interested in moving to Dallas let us know.  There is zero reason TX does not continue to take market share from it's top PCTI rival, Tennessee.

A Texas -sized pickup game

A Texas sized pickup game

Recently Dan the Man made a business trip to Dallas to promote his company’s services. Of course, one can make the argument that he really came to Dallas to play in his old pickup game and that his sales calls were just a side effect of his true motive to get his hoop on. As a bonus, BC made the trip to Dallas from Austin to see his old pal Krow and also to show Sabin some of his deadly pickup craft. I was glad to have both of these fine fellows as part of one of the truly outstanding and mediocre pickup games in the country. The following summarizes each player’s performance in the recent pickup game as we inch closer to go time in Scottsdale.

1)     Dan was nothing short of terrific. Maybe it was the fact that he felt comfortable playing with his old friends in Plano or maybe it was the fact that the pickup game was specifically organized on his behalf. But whatever the case, Dan was deadly in the midrange, handled and passed with precision, defended with competence and enthusiasm, and displayed the kind of conditioning that is normally reserved for Scott Donley. He also led his team to 6 consecutive victories to open the session. If I were to extrapolate his pickup performance with a PCTI performance, it would project to something like 8.5ppg, 5.5rpg, 4.0apg, and 2.0spg with solid defense and leadership. He was the best player on his team which included a couple of flat-out ballplayers. Yet, I’m not alone in thinking that Dan has pulled this trick before where he dominates pickup games in which PCTI members participate, but then leaves something on the table in his PCTI performances. As for the author, I think this is the year that Dan converts “pickup Danny” into “PCTI Danny”. An all-tournament berth could be in his future if he can make the conversion.

2)     Like some of his recent PCTI performances, BC produced a bit of an uneven performance in the pickup session as he had moments where he tantalized with tremendous basketball ability and other moments where he looked uncomfortable. This is understandable as he travelled 4 hours for the pickup session and played the same day, but also that he was guarded by a 6’8” Kirilenkoesque defender for much of the session. That notwithstanding, he showed the ability to knock down the 3 ball and midrange jumper, increasing his legend as PCTI’s original stretch 4. He also displayed excellent conditioning as he played something like 9 or 10 pickup games in succession. My favorite moment though was BC leading his fellow Tennessee natives in a stretching session after the games had concluded. This must be why he is so flexible.

3)     As for me, I did not produce my best basketball until the session had nearly concluded. Since Dan and BC were in town, I really wanted to show well and was probably pressing the first few games. I was also playing with 4 other guys who were not versed in the time-tested fundamentals of basketball success like shooting, passing, dribbling, and defending. So that certainly did not help my cause on an individual level nor did it help our collective team cause. But about 7 games in, I finally did some things to help my squad be more competitive like shooting and creating with some efficiency. Although Dan and BC’s team owned the night, I felt like my conditioning was sufficient to be able to help my team for a full 7 game PCTI series.

True story: As with almost every pickup session, we were in need of hydration after the pickup session. I told the fellas I would grab us some Gatorades from the local convenience store. BC was extremely accommodating, saying “Any flavor will do.” That was something I appreciated since I like simplicity. However, Dan the Man made the awkward request “I’ll take a Coconut Water instead of a Gatorade”, seemingly oblivious to the fact that said beverage is a novelty item and not sold at most outlets. After channeling my inner Indiana Jones and searching for this extremely rare artifact for something like 6 or 7 minutes, I gave up and purchased him a Gatorade like that of me and BC. As I presented these two with their hydration, BC was pleased with the selection while DK seemed disappointed that I could not produce the desired outcome.

Moral of the Story: If you’re rollin’ with DK to hoop, bring some coconut water with you.

The draft in pictures

One of my great regrets in life is that I was unable to attend the recent PCTI IV draft. From the videos produced, it seemed like a good time was had by all. So my contribution to the draft this year will simply be my thought pictures beside each draftees name:

1) Abe. Perhaps PCTI's best approximation of a sure thing. Puts up numbers on the court and notches on the bedpost.

 

 

 

2) BC. Bambi has come under a lot of fire this offseason for his unnecessary offensive at the Beas and his simmering rivalry with Eskildsen. Methinks that these motivations will allow Bambi to return to his rightful place as King of the PCTI Forest.

 

 

3) Cockstrong. A deserving second round pick although some argue he went one spot too low. PCTI's Barry White gives you points, boards, defense, and conditioning. Best swordplay in PCTI history.

 

 

4) Beas. Maybe the only guy who can give Abe a run for his money with the ladies. Great teammate and ballplayer parlayed a terrific Game 4 outburst last year into a second round pick this year. Remains to be seen how the ladies man will perform under the weight of expectations.

5) Pitto. WTF? I thought Skilly could've made this pick in the 7th round, but how can I begrudge anyone else for poor drafting when I set the gold standard for poor drafting just 12 months prior?

6) Sabin. When Cap used this pick on me, I knew the hatchet was buried between us and we could use all of our energy to make Joe the only 4-0 player in PCTI history. #loyalsoldier

 

 

7) Ben Wilson. Yes, I believe Big Ben will rise from the ashes just like another famous bearded man 2000 years ago. You're damn right I went there.

8) Dan the Man Krow. Honestly, who doesn't want this guy on his team?

 

 

9) BMac. Flyin Bryan seems to be the perpetual breakout star in PCTI. Seems to have moments in each PCTI where you think he is a top player, but sustainability is the issue. Maybe home cooking will do the trick in IV.

 

 

 

10) Spotlight. This guy has reached legendary superhero status in a single PCTI appearance. Never has a legend risen so high or so fast behind the strength of a 6 point, 2 board performance. #Intangibles

 

 

 

11) Bruise. Honestly, there was a part of me that was glad Bruise was drafted this low because it can only mean trouble for the other team. If we see PCTI II Bruiser in IV, Team Eskildsen's reincarnation could have a long day at the office. Get' em Bruise.

 

 

 

12) Hops. Of the handful of guys that detest me in PCTI, Hops is clearly my favorite. Guy is a good dude, solid ballplayer, and I always enjoy seeing him. However, refusal to train in the offseason has allowed last 2 guarded opponents to win an MVP award and to set a league scoring record, respectively.

 

 

 

13) Smo. Showed flashes of brilliance in PCTI III, especially with the 14 and 7 he slapped up in Game 2 last year. But world-record fouling got him out of rhythm for the rest of the tournament. Huge value pick here.

 

 

 

14) Wes. I still remember the guy from PCTI I who slapped up a 19 point effort on a bum ankle. But if I'm being honest, that seems like a long time ago. Here's hoping that Wes bounces back in a big way in IV and returns to PCTI relevance.

 

 

 

 

Happy Thanksgiving From The Real Actor of PCTI

I was funneling through some pic monies since there is nothing better to do in Shittsville, and stumbled upon my first acting sequence as 1988 "WWF Wrestling Fan of the Month."

The announcer brings up a great point.  Maybe I should have become a wrestler?

Morale of the vid stick: Moving forward, refer to me as Dangerous Danny Krow.

You Laugh, You Lose

A buddy sent me this the other day and Donley (the coolest guy I know, btw) said that I reminded him of Ibrahim Moizoos.  I take this as a compliment, as Ibrahim obviously had the tools to make it to the prestigious East/West bowl.  Perhaps this was a subconscious attempt by the #3 overall pick to wake me up and help me rediscover the tools within me that allowed me to make it to two All-PCTI teams in years 1 and 2.  We'll leave this mystery up to Matlock for now...

PS- My faves are Leoz Maxwell Jilliumz, D'Glester Hardunkichud, D'Squarius Green Jr, and Ozamataz Buckshank (B-EZ have you seen him on campus?)

PCTI Portfolio Review

This post came at a bad time since most stocks did poorly yesterday. If I would have done this right around the Live Draft, it would have been even more impressive. This is something I knew I wanted to do as soon as Toucan Dan the Froot Loops Man made his post at the beginning of last year Comparison Between PCTI Investment and Cash's Portfolio. If you don’t remember click here for the link, but the summary was 6 stocks that Fruit Dude thought would be a good investment and how they compare to some of the expenses we concur in PCTI.

For some reason Fruit put in his current company (ConAgra) at the end. Here is a breakdown of all 7 stocks (in the order he ranked them) from when he wrote the post (Jan 10) until yesterday’s close (11/14):

Rate	Stock	Price 1/10	Price 11/15	Change	%	High	High Date
1	Citi [C]	30	35.02	5.02	16.73%	38.47	6-Nov
2	Apple [AAPL]	423.24	536.88	113.64	26.85%	702.1	19-Sep
3	Verizon [VZ]	38.57	42.24	3.67	9.52%	47.26	4-Oct
4	Howard Hughes [HHC]	47.34	67.72	20.38	43.05%	73.88	5-Oct
5	Proctor Gamble [PG]	64.04	66.53	2.49	3.89%	70.07	25-Oct
6	ConAgra [CAG]	26.97	27.68	0.71	2.63%	28.76	18-Oct
7	General Electric [GE]	18.88	20.01	1.13	5.99%	23.12	8-Oct

This is truly incredible when you look at the Dow Jones and S&P 500, two very well know indices, over the same amount of time:

Rate	Stock	Price 1/10	Price 11/15	Change	%	High	High Date
1	Dow Jones	12,463	12571	108.32	0.87%	13611	5-Oct
2	S&P 500	1292.4	1355.5	63.08	4.88%	1466	14-Sep

Fruit Man’s 7 stocks raised an average of 15.52%. This is an awesome number, especially when you factor out ConAgra which was just a throw in. In fact it’s even better since he ranked them for us. Let’s say you have $10,000 to invest and you thought since everything that happens in PCTI is gold, you would put that money in to these stocks. Here is an example if you spread it out evenly ($1,428) over all 7 stocks.

Rate	Stock	Shares	Cost 1/10	Sold Today	Change
1	Citi [C]	48	1440	1681	240.96
2	Apple [AAPL]	3	1269.7	1610.6	340.92
3	Verizon [VZ]	37	1427.1	1562.9	135.79
4	Howard Hughes [HHC]	30	1420.2	2031.6	611.4
5	Proctor Gamble [PG]	22	1408.9	1463.7	54.78
6	ConAgra [CAG]	53	1429.4	1467	37.63
7	General Electric [GE]	76	1434.9	1520.8	85.88
	Total	269	9830.2	11338	1507.36

You would have made $1500 since January. Now let me take it one step further and show you if you took that $10k and spread it out according to his rankings.

Rate	Stock	% of 10k	Shares	Cost 1/10	Sold Today	Change
1	Citi [C]	25%	83	2490	2906.66	416.7
2	Apple [AAPL]	25%	6	2539.4	3221.28	681.8
3	Verizon [VZ]	15%	39	1504.2	1647.36	143.1
4	Howard Hughes [HHC]	15%	32	1514.9	2167.04	652.2
5	Proctor Gamble [PG]	10%	15	960.6	997.95	37.35
6	ConAgra [CAG]	5%	18	485.46	498.24	12.78
7	General Electric [GE]	5%	26	490.88	520.26	29.38
	Total		219	9985.5	11958.8	1973

One would have made nearly $2000. Since the One Man Fruit Stand is now on my team, I feel like I need to show everyone just how savvy this guy is with a dollar. I can’t wait to see the PCTI portfolio come January 2013!

AHOP, QP