2016 WWE Comparisons

One week from RIGHT NOW PCTI VII will be on and poppin' in Cincinnati.

In all likelihood this will be my final lead up post. Congratulations to everyone on surviving another off-season. Please remember to pack your backup shoe laces.

Since we'll be in Thursday, if this post doesn't mean much to you, plan on catching up with a little Thursday Night SmackDown and some Teddy's with the Fruit Stand Man and me.

See you soon!

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Beas : Dolph Zigler

First off, Zigler is undeniably attractive. As of late, the one time collegiate wrestler has fought to defend his reputation as the best pure wrestler in the game. Obviously if anyone appreciates the purity of things, it’s our very own nature lover. Zigler’s career goes up and down, while he’s held a variety of belts through the years, in no way is he a central figure these days. Does he deserve a spot battling with the best of the sport or is he destined to be the best of the rest type? It’s hard to say. I would argue that the combination of charisma, looks and athleticism is a formidable combination, but it remains to be seen.

TP: Big Cass 

New to the scene and mostly unknown, the first thing that jumps out about TP is his height and size, both of which have no equal in PCTI….and you can’t teach that! Cass can wreck shop in short spells but it is unknown if he’s got enough polish to match his obvious physical potential. If he does, watch out.

Rainbow Boy: Enzo Amore 

Like his tag partner Big Cass, this is his first year in WWE. Amore has unmatched energy and attitude to the extent that even a casual observer would say, “what is up with that guy.” Like Rainbow, who has never played organized basketball, Amore has a shockingly low amount of in-ring work accrued compared to the typical WWE Superstar. It cost him dearly when he knocked himself out cold while performing a routine bump at WWE Payback. Let’s hope Rainbow avoids the same fate. Nobody wants another trip to the hospital.

Bruiser: Titus O’Neil 

Obviously the first thing that jumps out about Titus O’Neil is his breathtaking stature. Even compared to the rest of the locker room, his size and strength separate him. Currently O’Neil is feuding with Rusev. The normally mild-mannered and level-headed O’Neil snapped recently when the Bulgarian Brute had the audacity to take to the mic on Memorial Day to taunt America. Just like I would imagine Bruiser reacting, O’Neil did not stand for an attack on country. To compound things, Rusev later mocked O’Neil in front of his children. In a fit of rage, O’Neil snapped and savagely attacked his rival. Like Titus O’Neil, Bruiser has quickly earned a reputation as a doting father and dedicated family man. We all know that aggression, frustration and strength is the recipe to a perfectly served Bruiser cocktail. Learn from Rusev and tread lightly.

Actor: The Miz 

Talk about two guys wrapped up in the Hollywood lifestyle. Recently the former reality TV star turned WWE Superstar left the company for a month to film a movie. The timing was odd as he recently captured the Intercontinental Championship. One can’t help but wonder if in an attempt to expand his brand, he is getting too far away from what worked in the first place. Likewise, Actor is a notoriously prepared and consistent PCTI performer, but observers would be fair to question how daily JTSingz music videos are affecting his training. Apparently staying in character means having cut up arms and a flabby chest, which on paper seems impossible and must require a truly unique training regimen. His teammates can only hope basketball fits in those plans.

BenWilson: Corporate Kane 

For years Kane wreaked havoc with a blend of unique physical strength and surprising athleticism. But things started to get a little more complex when Kane shed the mask, cut the hair and joined the white collar work force as a politician and WWE executive. Similarly, for years Ben dominated PCTI with size, quickness and his own maks of wonderfully groomed facial hair. But what will happen this year as a now clean cut and slimmed down Wilson divides his attention between basketball and a burgeoning career as a book czar? Is the Demon Kane still within, or will his game go to hell?

Sabin: Shane O’Mac 

 Here comes the money! Sometimes you never know what you’re losing until it’s gone. WWE was a shell of its former self during Shane O’Mac’s seven-year hiatus, just as PCTI suffered with Sabin gone. Why? For both guys the appeal is in their versatility. Shane O’Mac is capable of shining as a fan favorite, heel or elder statesman leader. On one hand Shane can stay above the fray as an organizer and executive, while on the other hand he may go flying off the top of the hell in a cell and through the Spanish announce table in an effort to catch Undertaker with an elbow drop. Likewise, Sabin is PCTI’s great conversationalist and everyone craves his advice on all matters. But is he above a petty trash talking war or going hard on the court? Of course not.

Wes: Neville 

Neville is small and did some really cool things when he burst on the scene. The thing is, I have no idea what happened to Neville. As in I truly don’t know where he went. Wes has had some PCTI moments, but none since we left Kentucky after PCTI II. Since then, I’m not sure where he went or if he'll ever return to that form.

Hops: Bray Wyatt 

Sister Abigail! While Hops has never given off even the hint of a haunting, super creepy, Southern Gothic vibe, there’s a lot of similarities between the two, based on the company they choose to keep. Bray and Hops both do their best work as leaders of men. Or maybe more accurately, they are gifted at leading a band of followers who help mask (in Bray’s case, literally) some of their own personal shortcomings. When Bray has gone out on his own and tried to handle things by himself, he has failed to emerge with the same ferocity and effectiveness as the Wyatt Family achieved together as a faction. Likewise, when Hops strays from his team at all costs persona, he’s not been as effective in PCTI. Hops greatest strength in PCTI, either on the court as a team-first guy, or off the court as the heart and soul of the QP is as the pack leader. May he never stray.

Abe: Brock Lesnar 

Two guys who are widely regarded as unstoppable forces. Size, athleticism, focus and blond locks, Lesnar and Abe Unit both are as formidable an opponent as you will find. But as the old saying in Texas (PCTI’s second most populated state even after losing Pun Daddy) goes, “there ain’t a horse that can’t be rode and there ain’t a man that can’t be thrown.” While both Lesnar and Abe appear to be completely unstoppable, they have been stopped. Both men have been humbled, though neither has lost his confidence. Abe’s status as the undisputed king of PCTI was on the line last year after a disaster in PCTI IIII and he responded with arguably his best performance to date. Much the same, there were questions about Lesnar upon returning from the UFC but he immediately silenced anyone foolish enough to question his dominance. Both guys are lone wolves which is risky considering that both guys are flake out risks. Lesnar has bounced in and out of WWE for years while Abe is a guy you feel like you have to worry about until he walks through the door (and puts on his shoes and jersey). Lesnar was smart enough to let Paul Hayman be his handler. Abe could certainly put his teammates at ease if he considered making a similar addition to his camp.  

Bambi: Kevin Owens

 Much like me, when you first watch Kevin Owens, you’re not going to be immediately impressed. But if you give it a little time, Fight Owens Fight will start to win you over. It’s never spectacular but he’s a hard worker and comfortable working with anyone he shares the ring with. Owens mouth is his gift and his curse. On the one hand, he has a quick wit and can get the last word in on anyone. On the other hand, he’s whiny. Kevin Owens, just like me, is a hard worker…to a point. If pushed hard enough we both will cave in to a spiral of self-pity and lash out whoever we can find to blame for our problems. It totals moments of greatness, as well as moments of absolute self destruction.

Spotlight: AJ Styles 

There may not be a more popular wrestler right now than the Phenomenal AJ Styles. Just like Spotlight, no matter what this guy does, people seem to like him. Like Spotlight, Styles was a late bloomer that earned his place as one of the best after years of persistence and continued refinement of his craft. For too long both were overlooked by the mainstream, but once they got their chance on the big stage they wasted no time proving to everyone that it was long overdue. However, now that they have climbed the ranks, one can’t help but wonder if they’re holding themselves back from taking the final step to the summit. Styles has shown he has the ability but refuses to part ways with his old running mates, the less capable and more devious Anderson and Gallows. As for Spotlight, he refuses to completely turn his back on the fuck up behavior of his youth that has left him without a jersey one year or severely hungover come game time on several occasions Both can point to their long past as evidence of their devotion, but each must turn his back on his old ways to truly reach greatness.

Dan The Boy: John Cena 

When the music hits for the fifteen time World Champion the crowd always goes crazy, then collectively catches itself and remembers how lame Cena is and tones it back. He’s got the jean shorts, he looks too short, he sprints to the ring, he’s just flat out way too in to it to possibly look cool. But the same stuff that makes Cena so easy to mock is what makes him impossible not to like. He gives it everything he has and it means so much to him that you can’t help but get caught up in it. He makes no apologies for how he is and doesn’t care at all what people think about it. That has made him the undisputed face of wrestling for nearly a decade. When you think WWE, you think John Cena. Same goes for Dan The Boy. Easily mocked for caring, trying too hard, wearing ridiculous things, telling you to pack an extra set of shoe laces, etc., Dan is the embodiment of PCTI. And like Cena, as other more physically gifted competitors fade, Dan is getting stronger and even more determined, making him ever the more formidable.

Donley: Roman Reigns 

As Reigns likes to say, “I am not a bad guy, I am not a good guy, I am THE guy.” Just like in WWE, in PCTI life can be tough when your roll is not clearly defined. Sometimes, in the case of the two-time champ Reigns and of Cockstrong Donley, this is more of a result of their uncommon versatility. But, there’s a thin line between doing a little of everything and doing a lot of nothing. Is it their fault for failing at times to properly carve out a niche, or is it on the WWE or the PCTI brethren for not clearly identifying and harvesting what each does so well? It's hard to say. Both guys are menacingly athletic and both earn A+ grades on the eye ball test. Both guys have had their moments where they dominated, and both guys have had their moments where it felt like a square peg was going in a round hole. We’ll see if it all comes together this year for Donley as it has for Reigns. Who knows, perhaps it’s an omen that current WWE World Champion Dean Ambrose hails from Cincinnati, too.