Thursday, September 22, 2011

Breaking Bad Lost Conversation

So after the recent PCTI draft, I had a chance to review the roster for both my team, Legs Feed the Wolf, and Josh Stephen's team, Breaking Bad. With each pick that went my way, I grew more and more confident that my team had the goods, and this feeling was confirmed once I had a chance to step back and evaluate each roster. On the one hand, LFTW has size, speed, strength, shooting ability, handle, defensive demons, rebounding masters, and one scoring savant. When I looked at Breaking Bad, I saw one awkward lefty with bony hips, one guard who likes to facef*ck the camera more than hoop, a cockstrong Wisconsin native whom I admire, one forward who struggles with layups, one who struggles with the 3 ball, an injured shooting savant, and a guy who refuses to defend, play hard, or develop chemistry with his teammates.

So naturally, I thought to myself: "Why do they like their roster so much?". I mean, at the end of the day, I understand why I like my roster because we genuinely like each other and we want each other to do well. Add in the fact that each of my warriors is committed to preparing themselves physically to produce outstanding performances, and I have the formula for a winning weekend. But I just couldn't understand why they liked their roster so much, too.

Well, the answer came to me a few days later, and here it is. Team Breaking Bad defines itself by the chaos and misery it produces internally. In other words, they hope that their team will play better by combining some of the most caustic and dysfunctional personalities in PCTI. I mean, look it, you throw Joe Thompson and Josh Pitto into the same pot, you're not gonna produce Filet Mignon, more like a shit sandwich. If that's not bad enough, throw in Josh Stephens and Brian Eskildsen, one a raging gunner and the other a fundamental, technical ballplayer that doesn't tolerate poor shot selection. I'm not so confident that's a great combination to start the team with. As if all those problems weren't enough, throw in the fact that Hops and Brian will incessantly have to remind their team to rebound, compete, play hard, and share the ball, and you have the recipe for an unmitigated disaster.

But maybe I'm overthinking this. Maybe their misery, lack of cohesion, disconformity, and terrible shooting will generate the results they are seeking. And maybe I'm putting too much value in the fact that basketball is a game that requires defensive competitors and guys who like each other enough to share the ball. I suppose only time will tell. But it helped me to listen in to secret audio from Breaking Bad last night:

BC: Sabin doesn't know what he's doing. He drafted guys who will compete, give a crap, and own the boards.
Stephens: I know, he's so stupid. I mean, look at our team and all the terrible teammates I got. That's what Sabin is missing.
Joe: All I know is I better get the chance to walk the ball up the floor and not generate any fast breaks for us.
Pitto: What? That's my job!
Stephens: Both of you shutup. I will have shot the ball long before either one of you ever touches it.
Dawson: (alone on the corner) I'm a good shooter, maybe we could work to get me some open looks.
All: Shut the fuck up, Dawson! We'll handle the strategy!
B-EZ: Maybe we should think about taking good shots and getting back on defense to slow up their transition game.
Stephens: Brian, we all know what a good shot is, you don't have to tell me that.
Hops: Yeah, but who's gonna stop Ben from scoring, keep Bruise off the glass, and stop Sabin from providing chemistry and winning motivation?
BC: Hops, Sabin is so dumb. He created a team with great shooters, competitive defenders, world class rebounders, and unselfish winners. Plus, they all like each other!!! Can you believe that? So dumb!
Stephens: Yeah, not like our team that hates each other, won't share the ball, takes bad shots, and doesn't care about defense. Now that's how to build a winner at PCTI.
Pitto and Joe: I'm gonna go practice walking the ball up the floor!
Stephens: I'll go practice contested 3 pointers from 3 feet behind the line!
Hops: I'll go practice shooting layups on Smo. I know it didn't work last year, but it should in PCTI 3.
B-EZ: I'll go read a book about basketball virtues from the 1970s.
BC: I don't care what you guys do. I hope we lose every game while I go for 20-10. After all, when I subjugate my offense so the team does well, I hate it. As long as I get mine, I'm good.
Pitto: Fuck all of you. I will personally prevent any of you from enjoying this weekend!
Donley: Maybe Sabin was right...chemistry does matter.
Dawson: I'm still open in the corner, guys....

And now, I understand.

Sabin

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