Monday, July 25, 2016

PCTI off-season dateless itinstick

What a tumultuous week it was around the virtual office of PCTI.

First Chairman Dan looked ready to push through a spring date for PCTI VIII, only to have Abe snipe his plans at the eleventh hour. Rumor has it that Dan is working the back halls as we speak, trying to forge and agreement.

No matter where you come out on this one, you gotta admit, it's so PCTI to have plans affected by Korean professional volleyball.

Perhaps sensing that the moment of chaos was the perfect time to strike, the PCTI Win King came out of the woodwork to simultaneously announce his reemergence and lead a Turkey-esque political takeover. Smo has a long history of poisoning the water at Dan's expense and right now it remains to be seen how this latest chapter will play out. From my view on the Bored, I'm content to let it all play out and am confident that the stronger leader will emerge and PCTI will be better for it.

In the meantime, I figured it was in the best interest of all to put out a loose schedule for the league's off-season business. This way you have something to look forward to, Or more realistically, you know the correct event to bitch about when it hasn't happened yet. Going off of past years, here's how things should play out on The Road To San Diego.

A final note: I plan to reprise the podcast this year under a slightly different format. The pod will serve as a reaction show for each of these events that I'll do in the days after each of these events goes down. The guests will be the guys who are behind each thing, and we'll work in some random check-ins as well.

OFF-SEASON SCHEDULE OF EVENTS

1. COMPLETED: Videos edited and uploaded to YouTube

my note - props to Deuce on his continued good work. I might be alone in this one, but I loved the slightly elevated view he worked in this year from the top of the bleachers.

2. Sabin re-stat including the return of the Sabin Productivity Rating

my note- Rumor out of DFW is that this process is already underway. In terms of the stats, it was a great (re)addition to have the realtime stats available this year and I think it played at least a small role in the competitiveness of the games. However, Sabin's stats will always be the official recognized stats of PCTI (thanks to Ben for standing in during Sabin's hiatus.)

As for the Sabin Productivity Rating (I think that's what it's called), for those of you who are new, this is an algorithm that only Sabin knows that is meant to encapsulate in one metric a player's overall impact. It's perfect for PCTI because if you rank highly you can use it as a way to feel better about yourself and if you rank low, you can disregard it as utter bullshit.

What I'd like to see: Sabin doesn't include the SPR on the initial stat sheet and instead counts down each player from bottom to top with what they scored and a quick take by him on what he thought of each guy's performance. Would make a great string of posts on the blog. I think everyone craves as much Sabin analysis as possible.

3. MVP and All-Tournament voting

my note- This is AHop's territory and I'm assuming that he'll head this up again this year. I never remember how many spots(light) we actually vote on but I'm counting on Hops to sort all this out.

What I'd like to see: This might already be on the blog, but it would be great to total up each guy's A/T and MVP honors through the years and get that in one place where everyone could see it. One fun fact that I think is true, Abe has been MVP in all of the even numbered PCTIs.

4. Captains named

my note - As the winning captain, Ben has the right to either stay a captain or hand off the job to someone of his choosing. The other captain will be the MVP.

What I'd like to see: This is always one of the best parts of the off-season. I pretty much laid out what I'd like to see in the post game six inteviews, go back and check those out if you haven't yet.

5. Captains establish pick order

my note - Draft strategy, draft strategy, draft strategy. I can't remember if the winning captain gets to choose if he wants the first pick or the snake two-three picks. Ben probably knows.

6. PCTI VIII roster is finalized

my note - If we've learned anything, this is a fluid, year-to-year thing. As I expressed to most of you in Cincinnati, I feel like every person this year (and Smo) has earned tenure and should have a spot for as long as they want one. Obviously, I hope everyone can make it next year but in the case that someone can't, this is when we'll make decisions about what to do.

what I'd like to see - Right now, we stand at 15 with Smo back in the fold. I wouldn't be opposed to rolling with an odd number but would be worried if the team with 7 had an injury and it turned in to 6 vs. 8. These are things we'll consider down the line, if need be. For now, it has plenty of time to play itself out.

7. Draft!

my note - Donley said it on the blog and I know I've had similar conversations: this should be the most intriguing draft in history. In year's past, it's been pretty easy to rank everyone and predict the draft order with pretty good accuracy. All you have to do is look at the stats this year to see how even everyone played and that should make this draft very interesting. The Kittens Disaster marked the death of the "draft a team with a profile in mind" approach and since then captains have been free to pick "best available" without any need to explain. My guess is this year captains will be forced once again to pick with an identity in mind.

what I'd like to see - Last year was fun with the Google hangout but I think we can make this even better. Google hangout is unpredictable and hard to keep track of everyone. With that said, I have no idea how we can make it better...it may be necessary to get Deuce linked in to this and think about taking the draft day presentation to the next level...we'll see.


8. Training season

my note - Cincinnati was perhaps the best example yet of how important it is (as we all continue to age) to put the time in to prep for this thing.

what I'd like to see - Videos/stories of the stupid things we do while we're in the gym are usually hilarious and in a weird way motivation to others to get their work in. I hope the trend of sharing this stuff only grows. If you haven't seen Nature's video of him doing defensive slides from last year, you're missing out.

9. Actor takes over and gets us ready for SoCal

my note - If we need a roommate draft, this is when it will go down. I think everyone loved staying under the same roof in Cincinnati and I'm guessing Singz will try to mirror that.

what I'd like to see - Don also raised the bar with the itinstick. I'll expect the same detail at VIII.




Saturday, July 23, 2016

PCTI 2016 Chairman of the BORED CANDIDATES US Presidential Comparisons

Another day in PCTI, another attempted coup d'etat. This feels more like the 2016 US presidential election.

Let's review....

(Editor's Note: I'm throwing my hat into the ring).

Denis Crown-TRUMP 
-Both have bad hair which makes you question who gives them a haircut (their dad's perhaps)? 
-Lack of training in the weight room combined with eating 20 twinkies makes both appear physically imposing due to being fat not strong. 
-Both enjoy fake wrestling a little too much which makes you think if they can truly operate in the real world. 
-Both also try to rule with fear which only works on the SHEEPLE in PCTI.
-Who needs facts when whatever daily narrative works for them.


Milo Smor-HILLARY
-Despite the contrary, both are very savvy with their email acumen--always get to its intended recipients.
-Both look exactly like IDENTICAL TWINS. Those body types are scary similar.
-When they talk their voice sounds like nails on a chalkboard.
-Both lack sense of direction despite clean driving records.
-Both are desperate for power despite their spouses still running their households.


JT$ingz-GARY JOHNSON
-Both are lobbying for New Mexico for PCTI9.
-Both have faces you want to punch.
-Nobody understands what they're actually doing.
-Both can't sing.
-Both don't have a chance in this race.


VOTE WITH CONFIDENCE IN PCTI 2016.

Tuesday, July 12, 2016

TP's Memunits, via Wilson

In typical rook fashion, TP still can't figure out how to blog on here.  Here is the list of memories he emailed to me that I'm posting for him...


1. Abe showing me how to win money in craps... Then showing be how to lose it.. Great time though.

2. Deuce not being at the bar for 6 minutes before being double stacked in the booth with some blondie.

3. Wes struggling to remount on his Kayak while trying to rescue everyone from the river bank.

4. Friday night cookout everyone just hanging on the stoop coming up with different ways to combine chili, dogs, burgers and BBQ onto one bun.

5. BC uncontrollably screaming into the camera after game 6.

6. The finger game on the rooftop @ the brewery.

7. Surviving the car ride to the river & experiencing a near DK meltdown over the lack of planning on how to get there.

8. Ben annihilating spotlight under the basket then proceeding to blame the ref for a poor call.

9. Spotlights pregame outfits. The cat shirt in particular that he continued to Rock throughout the weekend.

10. Coming to PCTI as a rookie into a group of guys with a ton of history together and being made to feel like I had been there since day 1.


Can't wait till San Diego boys. Couldn't think of a better way to experience California for the first time!


Poster's note:  [sic]

Hops Memories of PCTI7

10. The moment the Nashville crew got there and there was a huge love fest for 5 full minutes. So much love

9. Going to 6 games with most of the games being within a few buckets late, including the last 2 by one point. I thought this was the most evenly matched PCTI in history even though Scottsdale went 7 games.  Abe and Dan battling. Joe and Beas battling. Donley crushing people. TP’s guaranteed double double he hit. Bruise taking over. Sabin coming out on fire. There seemed like so many clutch shots. A lot of fight in both teams. Loved the competition.

8. The National Anthem being brought into PCTI (#selfcred) with Ben’s subtle tear wipe away, followed by the Act crushing the fake cry

7. Trivia Night – this is not a pat on my back because it could easily be dismissed but everyone (sans rooks) try to win and it is only fun because of that. It also helped we had just been served up some incredible eatz by Donley. Plus, I think Deuce playing the wrong answer music was the hardest I laughed all weekend.

6. The finger game – this sounds like it could go a few different ways but TP introduced a few of us to the simplest drinking game of all time. Also, Rhinegeist and the Fri/Sat bar were sick.

5. Wes falling out of his kayak… in the only part of the river deeper than 3 feet. Also, Wes dominating craps 2 nights in a row.

4. That house. It served its job and made hanging with each other that much easier, but was not in the best condition. It might have been one of the few places in Cincy that could hold us all so I’m grateful but here are some of the things that stood out: The crane out front the first day, the fridge that wouldn’t shut unless you used all your weight, the stairs with no handles, the ants I found under my air mattress Sunday morning, the dryer connection that blows the hot air out not being connected, and THAT SMELL. Even with the negatives it was great and will obviously be a permanent thing.

3. The rooks – I knew TP and had never met Rainbow, but they both delivered. I especially liked the moment we told them Smo didn’t get either of them in. Well done, you morons.

2. The new looks leading into games. Some highlights: Spotlight’s cat shirt, silver onesie, man bun, 
fanny pack; Rainbow’s Jeff Gordon outfit; patriotic shooting sleeve; Donley’s hoodie; JT$ingz mustache; everyone’s sock game; The Brat’s – Out On Bad Behavior shooting shirts. Let’s not forget the shirts Donley got us that is immediately my favorite shirt in my closet.

1. Saturday Night Dinner – honestly I look forward to this more than the games. The birthday song was epic, the speeches gave me all the feels (almost teared up during Sabin’s), BC (along with everyone since we started pounding beers on the river) being hammered, letting Abe try and count the voting, and just everything else that makes that the best shitshow of the year.

Honestly, I could make a list of 20 more things. The things I remember and cherish most is the individual time I get to spend with everyone at meals, car rides, and over beers. The QP is as strong as ever!  Shout out to Donley for an incredible job hosting. Can’t wait to do it again.


Monday, July 11, 2016

Top 10 from Actor/JT$ingz

Really miss you guys. I've got the worst PCTI Blues of all time.

Shoutout to Scott for putting together an excellent weekend.

10). Mark Davis and his ability to have everyone scream a nice "FUCK YOU" to his face with no Technical fouls issued all weekend.

9). BC kicking the ball (during game 3 I think) and the Bald Ref giving him a "Field Goal is Good" hand gesture.

8). Everyone passing in the backyard to get a grip on their nerves before game 1.

7). Ben's Umpiring.

6).  Wes' left-handed layup that had to be seen to be believed.

5).  Beas' "WET."

4). Donley's apathy after almost causing the biggest wreck in PCTI history.

3). Jeff Sabin returning to PCTI.

2). Bruiser and I (but Bruiser mainly) controlling the flow of the river/The car ride back and belting
out 90s jams with Beas, Bruise, Ben, and Abe.

1). Trivia Night/Hops in his complete element. What a night.

Top 10 Memories from PCTI 7

Gentlemen,


Let me begin by saying I had a helluva good time this past weekend. I'm glad to be back in the club and this was perhaps my favorite PCTI of all-time. Donley did a righteous job hosting the weekend, and a big part of our enjoyment has to be attributed to him. And although the BoD takes a beating from the peanut gallery, Dan and BC do an unbelievable job of providing structure to the club and making it a fun event for everybody. Respect.


Here's a list of 10 things that I will take away from this weekend in no particular order. All of these things were memorable in their own right:


1) Rainbow versus The River: Rainbow showed his smooth hydro-coordination by spilling 14 beer cans into an otherwise pristine and pure river. Hilarity ensued as he then chased down all 14 beer cans in an unorthodox fashion. Of his many signature moments on and off the court this weekend, the Great Beer Chase of 2016 stands supreme. On a related note, the two rooks are quality additions to PCTI and I look forward to their continued involvement in the years to come.










2) Dan's reaction to AHop versus Layups: Given that we all miss our fair share of layups over the course of a weekend, I'm not sure why AHop's layups have taken center-stage. But there is little doubt that DK gets a particular kick out of these. His reaction to Hops coming right down Broadway and missing a layup is something that took him a good 10 minutes from which to recover. It was a main topic of his enjoyment from the weekend. Not to be outdone, Hops may have had his finest and most meaningful shooting performance in his PCTI career. Touche.










3) Donley's Commanding Hosting Ability: Dude laid down a well-organized weekend, replete with group activities and a legitimate itinerary. He made solid recommendations for eating and enjoyment, but also remained flexible if the group wanted to lounge and watch videos. Got to meet Mr. Donley and now I have a firm understanding of why Scott boxes out so consistently and gives max effort on every play. I also know why Donley is so punctual. The only thing he didn't come through on was the dangerous thugs in Cincinnati that we were so frequently and unconditionally promised. But nobody's perfect. BOX!!!










4)   Video Sessions: Although we all love watching the videos and namely ourselves, there is certainly a more exciting dynamic brought to the table when we watch the videos with the whole group. Being able to laugh at one another for blooper moments and to celebrate one another for nice plays adds immediate payoff to our enjoyment. Plus, it gives us an opportunity to recover from hard-fought games. This should be a staple moving forward.










5) JT Singz. This dude has it all...great singing voice, legit hoops game, and a questionable moustache. Who didn't enjoy a nice serenade of 90s pop songs and soft R&B hits of yesteryear? Extra bonus to me for bringing home the happy birthday song in style. THIS IS HOW WE DO IT!










6) Ben versus the Trash Can: I honestly don't know what happened here. I was on the bench and didn't get a great view of it. But there was some human carnage that involved Ben, Bruise, Donley, a trash can, and a wall. While all of that was happening, BC went ahead and made a super-difficult, cross-body floater from 10 feet that turned out to be the championship-winning points. A well-timed diversion? Or just another strange basketball play in an ocean of strange basketball plays in PCTI history?










7) Birthday Cake: Legitimately appreciate Mr. Donley for getting me a birthday cake on my birthday. Also legitimately appreciate you guys singing happy birthday to me on the court. I will never forget it!










8) Near Death Experience: The ride to the river began inauspiciously with an extremely close call on the highway that involved TP's car crew and a young female texting driver. TP, BC, DK, Deuce, and myself nearly met our end while a texting female driver nearly rear-ended us and then came around the front for a second crack at it. While we were lucky to escape that incident with nothing more than momentary terror, she was kind enough to leave a little paint on TP's bumper which I am sure he does not appreciate. Disaster averted.










9) Unforeseen Bonding over Arizona Cardinals Football: Some of us became engrossed in a TV show involving the Arizona Cardinals review of the 2015 football season. Spot and I became annoyed by the generic coach speak, while others like Hops and Godon spoke up to demonstrate their large football brains. The best part was that Bruiser was annoyed by both groups given that he has forgotten more about football than any of us will ever know. THREE TECHNIQUE!










10) Saturday Night Dinner: BC's emotional leadership. Hops hijacking the dinner itinerary. DK re-hijacking the dinner itinerary. Random and heartfelt happy birthday rendition to an unknown 13 year old pre-pubescent dinner neighbor. JT Singz giving his own happy birthday rendition. Bruiser picking up my dinner tab. BC eating everybody's leftover ribs to add weight for next year. Spot, Bruise, and Sabin giving some heartfelt gratitude and toasts. Damn, that dinner had it all.










I loved this weekend. Thank you gentlemen for all that you gave.


Sabin









PCTI7 Fresh Memunits

Well, I'm miserable... PCTI7 was one for the ages, and spending some time recapping it will be the only way I get through this day.

On the heels of Donley's email and someone's idea to recap immediately following so we can have fresh memories to look back on, below are some that come to mind for me in no order.

  • Abe's "That was lovely" comment following the bus driver's worst have fun speech ever.  
  • A. Hop's dribble up the gut.  
  • Rainbow's camera swag turning into a blown layup and nearly a blown knee.
  • Breakfast Convo.
  • Wes winning $500... That's actually awesome.
  • Beas's emergence as an all time great instigator.
  • Mr. Donley's Facebook post.
  • BC on the verge of tears all day Saturday.
  • Deuce and Stick carrying all 13 on the float down the river.
  • Spotlight's lack of amusement in the background during the JT Singz river video.
  • BC hitting the biggest shot in PCTI history and no one caring because Ben knocked down an empty trash can.
  • The day time video session... Haven't laughed that hard in a while.
  • Hops commentary during the trivia.
  • The gritty Plano HJ.
  • Sabin and Stick's speech at dinner Saturday night.
  • Stickman vowing to start training today for PCTI8.
  • Me becoming a fan of JT Singz.
What a weekend.  It never gets easier.

Wednesday, July 6, 2016

The Calm Before the Storm

The Calm Before the Storm...

It's not the moment that it happens,
It's the moment right before,
It's not the squeeks of shoes or opening tip,
It's the calm before the storm,

It's that feeling that you get,
As the sweat begins to cry,
It's just you, the ball, and hoop,
And you swear that you could fly,

BC and Deuce demand attention,
And the Actor can't be ignored,
It's the love of building tension,
Just before the violent storm,

And if you've felt like this before,
Or you look at a teammate and see it in his eye,
You'll know I'm not talking of rain,
But that I'm talking about PCTI...

*Modified poem of Katherine Humpert*

Tuesday, July 5, 2016

Potential House Factions

PCTI7 tip on the horizon, this will be my last post of one of my favorite offseasons of all time. With the new wrinkle of the house, a return of two PCTI originals, and two rookies it should lead to several factions being formed... Allow me to take a stab at what they might be.

The White Bests: Beas, Spotlight, TP.

Image result for good looking group of guys


A shout out to a Clueless moment where Cher is taking Ty through campus and pointing out all the different groups, this group could not be more similar.  The relationship started immediately with Spot and Beas based around being privileged, athletic, good looking private school kids who aren't afraid to get their hands dirty, will add a newcomer in the mix in TP who seems to fit the necessary criteria.  With Spot as PCTI's Mr. Popular, he will take T under his wing early to let him know who the man around town is.  Rainbow would be an option, but nowhere near good looking enough for this crowd.

The Bash Brothers: Stick, DTB, Pun, Deuce.

Image result for bash brothers mighty ducks

The Stick/Deuce combo has been one of PCTI's most popular since year 2.  Everyone looks forward to when they get matched up at the end of the table and reminisce on who knocked out more people on and off the football field.  Anyone that knows the Stick knows he has a very soft spot in his heart and doesn't like anyone getting picked on, and has shown repeatedly he will stand up against bullying.  Enter the Brats, who have been beaten down by everyone repeatedly for their decisions, approach to them, and overall personality flaws.  In a surprising turn of events, one of the Board's biggest critics in the Stick steps up, takes the two Brat's under his wing, and lets the rest of PCTI know they will no longer be bullied.


The Social Outcasts: Actor, Rainbow, Wes, Donley.

Image result for social outcast

Like in wrestling, this is actually a crew compiled full of big mouths that have no problem speaking up and causing problems, but don't want have the social status within PCTI to have their agenda pushed.  Led by aspiring horrendous singer in Heath Slater/The Actor, this group of misfits will begin with Actor taking Rainbow under his wing like he does every new guy and loves the fact that he will in turn laugh at his horrible jokes.  Enter Donley, who's only in it after making a point in a recent post that he is PCTI's social outcast based on his claim he has no relationships within the crew, than there is Wes who could be interchanged in any crowd but is still trying to find his niche outside of being a Danny agitator.

Degeneration X: Hops, Abe, Wilson.

Image result for dx

This crowd prides themselves on being the renegades of the crew, doing whatever they want whenever they want.  With Hops playing the role as Triple H, the sometimes quiet troublemaker that is the brains of the organization, Wilson as the Road Dog who goes out and does Hops dirty work, and Abe as Shawn Michaels, the guy that provides the superstar status who can get away with anything he wants, this crew is the one that everyone wants to be a part of... But not really.