Ranking the Nicknames of PCTI

Ranking the Nicknames of PCTI

The past 3 years have generated some dubious and indicting nicknames that deserve to be stack ranked in order of explosive impact. There are most likely some nicknames that did not occur to me and others of which I am simply unaware. But these are my top 8 PCTI nicknames with affiliated comments and musings.

8) Quad Pod – I’m not sure anybody really knows how this group even came into existence or the origin of its moniker, yet each member of this group claims that the bond between it is “solid as oak.” But like most good stories, it started with alcohol and then morphed into the pursuit of an unreachable female. The endeavor ends in failure more from lack of ability than lack of effort. Perhaps “Four Horsemen” was already taken or they believed it to be overused. Whatever the case, Quad Pod makes a strong showing on the nickname list in its initial foray through PCTI chronology.

 

7) Bruiser – Never before has a nickname so aptly described one of PCTI’s participants. Part brawn, part chemical imbalance, part Terminator, but all heart. I have seen the Bruise almost murder DK in PCTI II for a perceived foul and also show great restraint when he thought about murdering PCTI’s impetuous child. I can’t figure out if this guy is tough on the outside and soft underneath like a Teddy Bear, or tough on the outside and tough on the inside like a Leavenworth convict. All I know is that the Bruise has a great nickname and everybody would rather be his friend than enemy. #realtuffjuice

 

6) Hops – Never before has a nickname so inadequately described one of PCTI’s participants. Sure, some of this nickname stuck because of his last name, but the moniker itself suggests that the player brings a certain level of bounce and explosion to the court. Not sure if Hops is playing possum and waiting to showcase his elite athleticism in IV, but insiders postulate that he may not have the same level of explosion that his name suggests. Whatever the case, all admit that this is a great nickname for a ballplayer.

 

5) Cockstrong – This nickname was borne in PCTI II when Donley and I had the chance to lock horns for 4+ games. As I attempted to take him to the basket, I was unpleasantly surprised that he was stronger than me and just as quick. After taking him to the hole a few times and having him knock me out of bounds or to the floor, I soon realized that tangling with this cockstrong Wisconsin native might not be the most efficient way for me to succeed. When Donley went to the bench, it unlocked my game and I began to play well. Coincidence? Probably not. Although he has earned every bit of this nickname, my only regret is that its inaugural appearance on this list is only at number 5. Regardless of the ranking, respect to my man.

 

 

4) Wes*Fil*A – This nickname sunk in like buried treasure. As soon as this moniker was uttered, most in PCTI agreed that it was a keeper. The nickname originated with the intent of shaming Wes into better performance on the court and to visit the weightroom occasionally. Ironically, all it did was increase the number of his visits to Chik-Fil-A in a misguided attempt to live up to his poor dietary standards. Some PCTI analysts were appalled at his PCTI II physical condition, and several others didn’t recognize him at all upon first sight. It will be interesting to see if Wes-Fil-A can own the nickname and make a return to basketball efficiency, or if he will continue to let the nickname own him all the way to 280 pounds.

 

 

3) Fruit, The Fruit Man, Dan the One-Man Fruit Stand – I’m not even sure what to say about this nickname. Beas bestowed this tag on the Godfather and I’m not even sure that he knows where it came from. Yet, there is a certain level of genius to it since nobody expected this moniker for the Organizer. It might be his affinity for Coconut juice or perhaps his trendy preference for today’s fad food item, but the “Fruit” name is here to stay and could climb the charts in the coming months.

 

 

2) Bambi – This nickname was borne in PCTI II when the awkward lefty made several heroic attempts to save an errant pass and ended up crashing into the Blue, reminding many of us of Bambi’s first foray onto the ice….all knees and elbows. Although Bambi has since tried to send pictures of a majestic, adult-male stag in an effort to convince PCTI participants of his regal bloodline, most think of a wobbly young deer that needs his Mommy to stay upright. Bambi has had a great run and will perhaps challenge for the top position very soon, but I would formally like to introduce a new nickname for this Burgundyesque player for next year’s performance….I will call him “11 and 6” from this point forward.

 

 

1) Spotlight – Nobody knows who Pat Higdon is. This unassuming, well-travelled man of the world acquired this nickname simply as part of an email title affiliation. But because that particular email strand went into the hundreds, the names “Pat Higdon” and “Spotlight” linked in a way that nobody could have predicted. Like Dexter’s Dark Passenger, it got in deep and will stick for all time and eternity. Player even started introducing himself as “Spotlight” before anybody fully realized what had happened. Can anybody knock him out of the top spot? Time will tell, but the smart money says no.

 

 

Sabin